Ok, ever since we watched “Episode 9000″ of South Park, we all know how fucked up Scientology is. I mean, if 4chan’s against something, it has to be bad, right?

Just in case you don’t know what Scientologists actually believe, there’s a run down in the following video:

So why should we care about this? I mean we all know they’re kookie, and this is hardly something unexpected, like Jews swinging live chickens around their head, or ruining the space/time continuum.

Well, it’s the exact content of the cartoon in this particular instance.

I have noted, from the imagery contained within, that Xenu is:

• a homosexual, or a metrosexual at the very least; Why else would he be so buff and have a pink battle helm (00:41 & 00:51 respectively)?
• likely to have worked for the United States Armed Forces at some point, as indicated by his more than willing stance on the use of hydrogen-atomic weapons (01:08);
• an enemy of, and has been raided by, The Avengers at least once (01:18);
• one of Superman’s arch-nemesii. Hence the floating diamond sub-space prison (01:20);
• insisting that all Scientologists be stuck in 80s fashions (01:30);
• making sure you will never have to ask someone to get you a cup of tea again (01:48).

Now, frankly, I’m beginning to think that Scientology looks rather cool from all this. I mean, I’d happily part with a few thousand dollars if it meant I was going to be happy and be able to shoot tea cups with my mind… But then again, Scientology also says that modern psychiatry is bullshit, which means I wouldn’t be able to get delightful little pills like Adderall.

Scientology = no drugs = stupid religion.