I just had a look at the top 10 search terms that bring first time readers to this blog. I do this every once in a while to see what is actually of interest to my non-regular readers. Personally, I would have assumed it would have been things such as much awesome custom cocktails, or perhaps some of my articles on cyberpunk fiction that is already a clear and present reality (or imminently pending) and why that makes cyberpunk a genre that people are less inclined to read lately.

But no, it’s none of those things.

It’s mostly Jude Law’s dick.

The GothClub’s Top 10 Most Searched Terms for First Time Visitors!

These are literally in the order of popularity by the way, and except for the last two, each have over a thousand first time visitors that have found the site through these…Thanks Google! It’s nice to know what you think my site is all about and who it’s relevant to in the eyes of search engine users.

1. jude law
2. avatar navi
3. navi porn
4. fucked to death
5. navi avatar
6. world of whorecraft
7. avatar sex
8. poire william
9. avatar navi porn
10. falcon punch

Holy shit, folks! Whilst Jude Law’s technically on top for a post I made about our society becoming like the film Gattaca, the combined weight of all the ones about navis actually outweighs Jude’s swinging non-blue cock by nearly 3:1.

I make one parody post about the missing sex scene from Avatar and the actual social implications of getting into some alien bush instead of actually negotiating for mineral rights, and somehow this becomes the most important thing for you first timers! It actually kind of makes me totally unsurprised that World of Whorecraft is on there (even though it was a post about living our lives in virtual simulations), because you clearly can’t deal with real porno (so I’ve linked it permanently for you to make your lives easier), and you figure Falcon Punching a woman is the best way to deal with any potential unwanted complications that may arise from your inter-species erotic capers.

That a liquor made it on there at all genuinely surprises me…

*facepalm*

June 11, 2010 9:00 pm	to	June 12, 2010 5:00 am
June 18, 2010 9:00 pm	to	June 19, 2010 10:00 am
June 25, 2010 9:00 pm	to	June 26, 2010 5:00 am
July 2, 2010 9:00 pm	to	September 4, 2010 5:00 am
July 9, 2010 9:00 pm	to	July 10, 2010 5:00 am

DIRT, the club that caters to the younger crowd with their new fangled “hardcore” and “new-punk” and “nu-metal” and scat-boards, has finally found a new home and is meant to be getting a regular Friday slot. With Saturday nights getting rather over crowded, this now gives an opening to people that have their free time on a Friday night as their attempting to avoid sabbath dinner with family *cough* It also allows for a bit of club hopping between this, Silhouette for the more traditional music, and maybe even Cherry Bar if you feel like the cock rock.

Now situated at The Night Owl, 33 Elizabeth.st, Melbourne, DIRT is all about having a good time and not caring what others think. It’s been out in the cold for a bit, and SKOL doesn’t seem to be coming back yet (not that it was really a different club, but y’know) but at least this means there’s a few things on a Friday now.

A real review will be forth coming once I’ve actually checked out the new digs.

Entry is $12, or $10 with the flier.

Drink Specials (until 11pm):

• $2.50 for Carlton pots (but why would you do this to yourself?)
• $4.00 shots
• $5.00 basic spirits