It’s been a while since I did an article series, so I thought I’d get back into it with something that’s been on my mind for a while now. One of the things about being somewhat, shall we call use a common term, voyeuristic is that I sit and I watch people. I do it all the time. It’s not a sexual thing, although it is enjoyable, exciting, and sometimes downright amusing, to watch other people engaged in sexual activities, it’s not always a sexual thing. I watch people at all times, observe, note, put it all down in a little book that I creepily file away when it’s complete and then judge you all in my mind… Ok, maybe not those last two parts. I’m rarely judgmental unless you happen to be a raving jizz-magician, and I certainly don’t keep track of everything in a little book, black or otherwise.

But I watch.

Ever since I watched the goth scene in Melbourne effectively start to implode due to internal politiking and little microfactions of people, I’ve been looking for somewhere else to hang out that still plays EBM, Industrial, etc. It’s why even when it was seemingly going strongly with 3-4 clubs per weekend I started to pull back from things. I found that new place inside the fetish clubbing community (although like all voyeuristic types, I still hang back and rarely directly engage… I should be a war journalist!), which in some ways has a large cross over within the goth community (fashion, music, dress aesthetic, insistence on drinking either absinthe or the cheapest shamppaggin), but more surprisingly has so few people in the actual cross over, socially. This is in direct contrast to something like the metal and the punk scenes where goths freely flow in and between them.

Observations about degrees of separation aside, one of the areas where the most basic cross overs seem to be are sexual mores. Areas such as:

• Bondage, Discipline, and who wears the pants;
• Sadomaschism, pain & angst;
• Sexual preferences vs sexual fetishes;
• Polyarmoury & Mahogany;
• Drawing the line and the people that Just Don’t Get It.

There are other subjects I’ll probably end up covering as the time goes by, but I’m just finding at an anecdotal level at the very least the interplay between people and their self ascribed, or 3rd party projected, sexuality, kinks and fetishes to be both an entirely engrossing thing as well as a breeding ground for the kind of drama that caused the initial fracture on the goth scene. The irony is that one supposes that so much of that drama doesn’t exist on the fetish scene, and in some ways it doesn’t… It’s simply replaced with an entirely different kind of drama. The flowchart of who’s slept with whom is on par, yet it doesn’t seem to be a cause of angst, unless you actually look at the ‘type’ of sleeping with.

And once again, it all come straight back down to communication.

No one ever seems to do it well.

So this series of articles is going to be an attempt at communicating what so few people manage to do on their own.

You might also like to read:

1. On Gothic Sexuality Pt2: Monogamy is safe, but Mahogany is safer.
2. When Modern Gothic Romance & Inevitability Collide

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